What Is Stimming? Understanding Self-Stimulatory Behaviour in Autism
If you’re parenting or working with an autistic child, you’ve likely encountered the term stimming. This refers to self-stimulatory behaviours such as hand-flapping, rocking, spinning, pacing, or repeating words or sounds. While these actions might appear unusual to others, they often serve an important purpose for the individual, providing comfort, joy, or a sense of regulation. For parents of autistic children, stimming becomes a familiar and normal part of daily life. It’s why you might see a child stimming in public while their parent appears completely unfazed, because, to them, it’s simply part of who their child is.
So what is stimming, really? And should we be worried about it? Let’s explore.
What Is Stimming?
Stimming is short for self-stimulatory behaviour. It’s something we all do to some extent, think of tapping your foot when you’re nervous, twirling your hair when you’re thinking, or humming when you’re relaxed.
For autistic people, stimming often plays a much bigger role. It can be a way to:
• Regulate emotions: like calming down when overwhelmed
• Manage sensory input, such as blocking out loud noises with humming
• Express excitement or happiness
• Cope with uncertainty or transitions
Common Types of Stimming
Everyone stims differently, but some common examples include:
• Hand-flapping
• Rocking back and forth
• Spinning or twirling objects
• Repeating words, phrases, or sounds (known as echolalia)
• Tapping, flicking, or lining up items
• Chewing or mouthing objects
• Making noises or singing under the breath
Some stims are barely noticeable, while others may draw attention in public.
Should Stimming Be Stopped?
The short answer is: not unless it’s harmful.
Stimming is often an essential form of self-regulation. Trying to stop it can cause distress, anxiety, or even shutdowns and meltdowns. Imagine being told to stop bouncing your knee or fiddling with a pen when you’re anxious, it can feel like your coping mechanism is being taken away.
That said, if a stim is physically harmful (like head banging or biting) or disruptive to learning or safety, it’s important to approach it with understanding. We don’t want to suppress it, but we might:
• Offer safer alternatives (like a chewy necklace instead of shirt chewing)
• Create a calming environment
• Support the child in identifying what they need (sensory breaks, quiet spaces, etc.)
How to Support a Child Who Stims
Here are some gentle, respectful ways to support stimming:
1. Observe without judgement
What does the stim seem to be helping with, boredom, stress, joy?
2. Respect their need to stim
If it’s safe and not harming anyone, let it be. Acceptance is powerful.
3. Provide tools
Fidget toys, sensory spaces, headphones, or visuals can all help with self-regulation.
4. Teach self-advocacy
As children grow, help them understand their needs and advocate for sensory support in school or public settings.
5. Challenge stigma, not stimming
It’s OK to stim. The world needs to adapt to autistic people, not the other way around.
Final Thoughts
Stimming is a natural part of being autistic. It isn’t something that needs to be “fixed” or trained out of someone, even if watching our children spinning in circles makes us feel dizzy! In fact, when we understand and accept stimming, we’re helping to create a more inclusive world where autistic children can thrive as their true selves.
If you see an autistic person stimming in public, please don’t stare, pass comment, or try to intervene. Just let them be. They may be experiencing overwhelm, and stimming could be the very thing helping them stay calm and avoid a meltdown. Respecting this space is a simple but powerful act of inclusion.
At SEND Meadow, we support parents, carers, and educators to understand the ‘why’ behind behaviour. If you’d like help navigating SEND processes or understanding your child’s needs, feel free to get in touch.